Happy New Year, my friends. As we enter into 2023, let us remember what brought us here but also find the peace in moving forward. While I do believe every day is a new opportunity for change, there’s something so profound and powerful about entering into a new year. That being said, my fiance once said to me – every new era of life requires a different version of you.
The art of moving forward in life
Moving foward in life is a complex thing to me. It’s often misunderstood how hard it is to do so. There are all sorts of beliefs around this. Some want to live in the past, some want to reflect, and some want to flat out dismiss it like it never even happened because it’s too painful.
What I’ve learned through years of therapy and self growth is that there is an art of moving forward. This is not to say you should forget the past. That is actually detrimental to the healing process but it’s crucial to use it as information to make decisions about what’s best and healthiest for you, while guiding you forward in life.
It’s not healthy to stay in either end of the spectrum: living in the past nor forgetting about it altogether. The past provides facts and data that we can use for knowledge as power. I’m a firm believer in that last statement: knowledge is power.
Moving forward requires acceptance
Moving forward requires a level of acceptance of our past. It requires us to look at it, analyze the facts and data, and decide to reflect and leave behind the things that no longer serve us. My dad always says “if you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.” There is so much power in that statement, more than we give it credit for.
To move forward we must reflect and accept the things that happened in our past, whether they were done to us, or we chose to do them. Reflecting can be hard when it comes to painful moments but if we don’t take the time, we won’t be able to understand what got us in our current era of life and how to move forward into a new one.
Finding acceptance for every new era
After reflecting upon what’s led you to this moment, it’s critical to find acceptance with your past. This is often an overlooked step because we want to jump right into the next era. Without finding acceptance and chosing to move forward before we’re ready, we’re bound to repeat the same patterns in behavior. While this can bring moments of goodness, this more commonly leads us to be prone to make the same mistakes.
I’m going to repeat what my dad always told us – if we did what we’ve always done, we’ll get what we’ve always gotten. This is why finding acceptance lays the groundwork for a new era of life.
Here are some questions to help guide you to finding acceptance:
- What decisions have I made in the past that have led me to my current life?
- How are those serving me?
- Do I understand why decisions I’ve made have resulted in my current life?
- How can making different decisions going forward guide me in a new direction?
- What will my new decision making criteria be?
Answering these questions will guide you to a place where the writing is on the wall. It will help you clearly see that old patterns are no longer serving you.
Entering into a new era in 2023
Entering into this new era of life in 2023 is an exciting time. Some of you may have come off of your hardest year yet, some may have come off of your best year yet. Either way, it’s what we choose to do now that matters.
This is the part where there’s a fine line in promoting actions that result in burnout versus taking actions that serve us for the future. Society has taught us that we have to be in go-mode 24/7 if we want to be “successful.” While, much like so many of you, I spent a lot of my 20’s striving for this, I’ve learned in my 30’s that it does not serve any of us well.
It takes intention to slow down, take time to reflect, and purposefully choose our actions moving forward.
Making moments count for every new era
As we enter into 2023, it’s important to make the moments count. Don’t just cruise through life on autopilot. If I’ve learned anything as I’ve grown older it’s that life is so precious and we only have one shot at it.
What we choose to do today is so important for not only us but those around us as well. Speaking of those around us – did you know that you’re the culmination of the top five people you spend the most time with. Are you choosing wisely there? Reflect!
It’s time to make the moments count for you and your loved ones. It’s time for 2023 to be your year. Growth comes from uncomfortable places and this certainly takes work but I believe in you.
Every new era of life requires a different version of you
Life has a funny way of showing up. You can choose to say “why is this happening to me?” Or refraim your thinking to “what decisions have I made for this to be an outcome in my life?” and use that as data to move forward in the right direction. Sure, there are acts of God or things out of our control that don’t apply here but you get the point.
Special note: I also feel it’s important to call out that trauma is a whole different animal and isn’t as easy to digest but if you’re a victim of trauma, I encourage you to seek help and don’t stop until you find the right professional(s).
In 2023, I hope you find strength, balance, and peace to have your best year yet. My wish for you is that you’ll not let the motivation of a new year wear off as we walk through 2023 but that you hang onto it as if your life depends on it, because it does.
If you found this post helpful, let me know!
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